PSA

Calm the Fuck Down

Those experiences that remind me that the ideals I hold close to my heart are far from my reality are often humbling ones. Every now and again I am given that reality check that helps me to focus & forces me to reevaluate my routines. The things I work towards must remain exactly that. Things that I must WORK towards those ideals I wish to make a part of my world.

A lot of time that means for me to do things I don't like to get into what I want, or pausing some passions in order to allow others to thrive. It is definitely hard to do but it is more than worth it. But through it all it all I must stay true to myself in fighting my way to my dreams so I can breathe or else I will die.

It's great for me to break boundaries but there are places that must remain unbroken to ensure my survival. Like the home.. where the heart should be. So since I'm still making my way I unfortunately have to finish it up along the past of other who still controll most of my life.



I'm obviously so over who they want me to be but it looks like they want a little more bad acting on my part. Hahaha, in siturations like this I give the people what they want.

Bunches of Love
xoxo

Ronnell <3

Gender Benders

..Always Kill it!!!

Catch of The Day

It's easy to forget the value of your worm until you launch it out into the water and watch the fish try their hardest to make it their own. Haha Everyone could use a little reminder here or there. & mine feels good.

Bunches of Love <3
Ronnell ;~]

Progress: A step closer on my independence.

I start work tomorrow. I am beyond excited! It feels really validating to finally be under employment. I am feeling so much more comfortable, especially at this pivotal period in my life. The day that I can go to work and come home with a check large enough to not need any handouts will be like this times twelve.

Although it sucks to be in a position where being your true self will minimize your support system it feels (emotionally or financially) the early leap to self reliance will get me that much closer to being used to making it on my own. It's a step by step process and this is just the beginning. After I get the financials right I get to relocate to surround myself with those who do support me.

And the rest of my life's structure will revolve around my work and my surroundings. Aaahh, I'm just really happy to be me right now. Feels wonderful to be making something of yourself and I think it's all gonna be alright.

Bunches of Love<3
Ronnell ;~]

Sometimes It's Like..

Are you gay? Then once you're gay, it's like..Are you feminine? then once you're feminine, it's like are you a slut? then once you're a slut, it's like.. Do you have aids? Then once you have aids, it's like.. oh never mind.

That's just a thought I had that went on for a while inmy head so I decided to let it out. But my main point here is to express the layer upon layer of presure that I experience on a daily basis. Even after coming out I still feel an immense amount of social restrictions on me being from both the gay and straight community to be a certain way to fit a certain mold.

Trust me it is confusing, it is a challenge, it is annoying, & it makes it that much more difficult for me to just do what I want at the end of the day without thinking twice. I know that I am usually a strong like willed person etc and like all for being yourself and self expression but honestly I'm 17 & outside opinion/perception still probably has more of an affect on my development than it should.

I know I can't let these social norms go too far into my core because it'll make me miserable but sometimes it's like existing outside of or in between them can become pretty miserable too.

Bunches of Love <3
Ronnell ;~]

View. Gag. Vote.

Vogue Evolution

Oh dear, it's not everyday that I bounce in front of my television snapping my fingers and shouting out cheers of encouragement. Today was special. On America's best dance crew the Vogue Evolution group hit close to home for me & now have my full support. Although their image and their energy is larger than life and there fore much larger than mine I dtill feel honored to finally be represented in the mainstream. I mean c'mon two of my favorites gay people and dancers what a wonderful combination.



The entertainment value is undeniable. & the talent is totally there. The vogue style has come from an unseen, unheard of style to being featured on national Music television.
The creativity, plus the comfort-ability in their own skin, in addition to the empowerment is allinspiring.



To be honest the whole show is pretty amazing there is so much talent but I must admit that I am somewhat biased here. It will definitely be interesting for me to see how America responds and just how far they will make it. Again, their achievements thus far alone are monumental. I am happy for them, I am driven to learn to vogue, I am so proud, and I'm excited for what's next to come.

Bunches of Love<3
Ronnell ;~]